Happy is what happens

That's why I couldn't be happier.
No, I couldn't be happier.
Though it is, I admit,
the tiniest bit
unlike I anticipated.
But I couldn't be happier.
Simply couldn't be happier.
Well - not "simply" -
'Cause getting your dreams,
it's strange, but it seems
a little - well - complicated.
There's a kind of a sort of...cost.
There's a couple of things get...lost.
There are bridges you cross
you didn't know you crossed
until you've crossed.

It's been over a month since my last post! School and weddings and colds have kept me on my toes. But, what has cracked me up this month has been labels found on household products.

On a bottle of Aussie Shampoo:
"Sometimes your roots are greasy, your ends are frazzled, and your car won't start. This helps two of those problems."

~~ More added later. Time for work.~~

there's no shame in being crazy

Well, it kind of hurts

when the kind of words you write

kind of turn themselves into knives.

And don't mind my nerves,

you could call it fiction,

but I like being submerged in your contradictions, dear,

'cause here we are.

Here we are.

Conversation with a very sweet man:

K: I love all the compliments.

M: You deserve them.

K: Hehe. You keep me on my toes!
M: So that it's easier to sweep you off your feet.

Part of Andrew's ode:
"You're the shampoo to my hair.

You're the braces to my teeth."

And Ben, quoting comedian Demetri Martin:

I got some new pajamas with pockets in 'em. Which is great, because before that, I used to have to hold stuff when I slept. But now I'm like, 'Where's my planner? There it is. "Keep sleeping." All right, perfect.'



Image from getrichjournaling.com

i feel like such an insomniac

I'd like to make myself believe

that planet earth turns slowly.

It's hard to say

that I'd rather stay

awake when I'm asleep,

'cause everything is never as it seems.

'Cause I get a thousand hugs

from ten-thousand lightning bugs

as they try to teach me how to dance.

A foxtrot above my head,

a sock-hop beneath my bed;

a disco ball is just hanging by a thread...

After my cell phone started playing Beethoven's Sonata Pathétique...

R: I think you're getting a call.

K: Oh, that's just M texting me.

R: It plays a song?

K: Don't be jealous. It plays the same song when you text me.

R: I'm not jealous. It just seems like an awfully big celebration for a text message.

Talking to a friend hours after hanging out...

K: What else is up?

B: ...Other than that, I've been sitting around. I'm not quite as interesting when you aren't around say, "You're pretty interesting."

A mysterious IM Nathan left on my computer:
Thank God for the internet....where you can just go idle at 4am without a worry. Couldn't do that in like.. an alley. Wake up with a witty note.... You wouldn't be like "Nice, a message." You'd be like "Why didn't I notice this?!"

Image from http://www.jpgmag.com/photos/120294 via lilidonnelly.com.

one phone call from our knees

Oh, it's your light

Oh, it's your way

Pull me out of the dark

Just to shoulder the weight

Cryin' out now

From so far away

You pull me closer to love

Closer to love

Referring to a song....
Girl: Do you have "Sex on Fire?"
C: Only when I like to spice things up.

Referring to a roller coaster...

RM: I can't wait to ride the dominatrix.

C: You might want to rephrase that.

RM: Oh, oops. At least I can blame it on being dyslexic.

And we'll end with Jonathan who was trying to describe the movie Terminator 2 to me:

"It's like riding an epileptic tiger through a Honda dealership during a hailstorm."

Fog lifts to reveal potential

Across the sky,
the world it learns...
So must I.




My sister provides me endless entertainment...


Whether we're just having a conversation:
K: (pointing to small shelves) Did you see my new shelves?

M: Yes. What are you going to put on them?

K: Oh, you should know.

M: Books?

K: I could only fit one book on a shelf.

M: Oh, right. Soap?

K: Yes. I have shelves to keep my soap on.

M: Your cell phone? Or pictures of me?

K: (points across the room) What's in that box?

M: Oh. Shotglasses. Well, I think it would look better with pictures of me and soap.



Or playing her version of "20 Questions:"
M: What are five qualities you look for in a friend?

K: Compassion. A sense of humor. Honesty. Intelligence. Tolerance. You?

M: Also a sense of humor. Loyalty. Friendliness. Steadfastness. Availability. *Thinks for a minute* Wow. If you take away sense of humor, all my friends need are the qualities found in a good dog.

even just for a day

If I were a boy,
I would turn off my phone;
tell everyone it's broken
so they'd think that I was sleeping alone.
I'd put myself first
and make the rules as I go...
'cause I know that she'd be faithful
waiting for me to come home.


It's been an interesting month; many ups and downs that explain the time that has slipped away. But many clever or insane conversations have been held or overheard...and some have been remembered and shall be posted.


First, from a commercial...
People hang on his every word...even the prepositions.


Up next:
A conversation with a stranger on a flight to St. Louis...
RSS: Yeah. Ayn Rand basically says, "do what you want."

K: ...but not volunteer.

RSS: Okay. You're right. Not "do whatever you want." "Do whatever I think you should want."

K: What a saint.


Finally:
At a recent baseball game against the San Diego Padres...
*Setting the scene: the players had recording themselves saying clips from Anchorman, which played after one of the innings.*

Players: Stay classy, San Diego.

C: BUT YOU'RE PLAYING SAN DIEGO!

RM: AND YOU'RE LOSING!

a long, long ride on my motorbike

This thing called “love,”
I just can’t handle it.
This thing called “love,”
I must get around to it.
I ain’t ready…
crazy little thing called “love.”

*****

At church:
Father R: We’re getting a new priest soon. His name is Bjorn. Sounds like the noise a car makes when it goes by… Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeejorn. *Pauses for laughter.* See, now you guys
aren’t going to be able to forget his name.

*****

At work:
RD: Yesterday it was so hot and humid. It was like stepping into...a hot and humid cloud.

*****

Image from acopsthought.com
See also the car I want...

It's the climb

There’s always gonna be another mountain
I’m always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose
Ain’t about how fast I get there
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side...



A few days ago...
K: I heard on the radio that 43% of adults text message other people in the bathroom. We’re either finding strange ways to show our affection…or we’re really stretched for time.

J: Texting? That’s not affection. Now when I Face-stalk you while I’m in the bathroom, that’s affection.

K: That’s disgusting. And explains why we’re not Facebook Friends.

J: Would you rather I just call you?



Tonight, after leaving class, I sat in construction traffic…
and then my car’s battery died.
K: So, when I got in the car at school, the clock said “9:45pm.” And when I got home it read “1:10am.”

M: But, the grad school is like...15 minutes from your house. It took you over 3 hours to get home?

K: No. The car’s battery died. So the clock read “1:10am,” but it was really about 11:15.

M: …You know, you can reset your car’s time.

K: You’re joking!

M: And you’re either very sarcastic…or a complete moron.

All About the Wordplay

Are you prepared to take a dive
into the deep end of my head?
Are you listening
to a single word I've said?


Conversing with a crazy man...
R: She looked at me and blinked.
K: Blinked? Or winked?
R: Blinked.
K: Then who cares? We all blink.
R: While looking at someone?
K: Uh...yes.
R: I don't care what you say. This is so going on Craiglist's missed connections.


And Rachel, trying to put my mind at ease:
"Eh, just wait 'til you finish grad school. You'll be more of a globetrotter than the guys from Harlem."


(Image is from Jim131314 on Photobucket)

If you find a man that's worth a damn...

When you see my face,
hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell.
When you walk my way,
hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell.

*****

Spent time with two amazing ladies tonight. I hadn't laughed so hard in a while and am still feeling a bit giddy... If I had met a guy or two, it would have been the perfect evening. :)

*****

Talking to a female friend about a man I have always had feelings for:
K: If he were gay, this would all just be so much easier.
M: If he were gay...or if I were gay?
K: If he were gay. ...If you were gay it...actually wouldn't help my situation at all.

*****

Trying to decide on a drink:
K: I can't decide what drink to get. *Turns to waiter* I know you get this a lot, but if you were a martini, which one would you be?

Waiter-in-training: *Sitting down and taking drink menu* Hmm... Well... I'm a romantic, so I think I'd be a Long Lost Love.

K: *After deliberation* Okay, a Long Lost Love it is.

Waitress: *Delivering drink* One Long Lost Love. *Sighs* I need one of those.

K: *Laughs* Me too.

*Time passes and waiter-in-training returns to table*

Waiter-in-training: I just noticed we have a Heartbreak Martini. I think I'd be that.

(Still unable to figure out if he was flirting...or just wanted me to buy another drink....)

Kick off your Sunday shoes!

I get this feeling
that time's just holding me down.
I'll hit the ceiling
or else I'll tear up this town...

It's been a long few days! Too much school work and not enough time for real, honest-yet-amusing conversation.

Last night, in an effort to alleviate school stress and anxiety, I popped in an episode of Will & Grace, my all-time feel-good show. In one episode, Jack and Karen get so upset that their favorite shows are canceled. They are unsure of how to carry on until they see Frazier's Lilith. They hound her and after she leaves they exchange a couple of cute lines:

Karen: Hey, Jackie, did we get a little nutty thinking that some made-up character could help us?
Jack: Maybe a little? But it doesn't matter. We don't have to resolve this until the same time next week.

Marvelous. Almost as good as the Matt Damon episode.

Daydream Believer

Cheer up, Sleepy Jean.
Oh what can it mean?


Headed out last night to get a drink with a friend. It doesn't take much before my vocabulary skills begin to decline rapidly.

S: You've only had two drinks. And you're already feeling it?

K: I am. But I haven't said anything like "badder" or "goodest" yet.

S: So we're in the clear.

K: Yes. Anyway, he was working for Markheed Loctin. Wait....

S: *Laughs* Never heard of that place. Say it again.

K: Markheed...what is the name of the company?? Ah, Lockheed Martin.

S: And so it begins.

K: Hey! This time I only messed up a proper noun. That's completely excusable.

S: ...No...It's really not.


And, discussing an amazing weekend she had...
R: I would gladly pee in the woods for one more day if it meant we got to spend more time with each other.

You know, only the good die young.

Come out, Virginia, don't let me wait...
You Catholic girls start much too late.
Ah, sooner or later, it comes down to fate.
I might as well will be the one...


Comedian on radio:
"My son's a jerk. He put super-glue in my Preparation H. My daughter's no prize either. In high school, she was voted Most Likely to Conceive."


And the conversation that wins the prize for the day...

H: Can you name the largest lakes in the world?
D: Okay. The Dead Sea—
H: —Wait. Excuse me?

Make Me Lose Control

Turn the radio up for that sweet sound,
hold me close, never let me go.

Went to an 80's theme party tonight. We ran out of some supplies, so Amy (completely decked in 80's clothing) and I ran to the grocery store. We attracted some stares and comments (mostly due to Amy's bright pink tights!).

Random mother and daughter...
Mother: Those are like the clothes people wore before you were born.
Daughter: Well, when I grow up, I'm not wearing clothes like that.

Random girlfriend to boyfriend...
"When was the last time we went to a party?"

"I've got the slightest of a jealous bone"

Inside her head may lay all the answers

for curing diseases;

from baldness to cancer...

Salt of the earth and a real good dancer...

But I really hate her.

I'll think of a reason later.

J: It's just that--

K: Shh! Celeste's song is on.

J: Who's Celeste.

K: The ex-girlfriend of an ex-boyfriend.

J: That means you are... (makes calculations with his finger in the air) ...in more desperate need of a man than anyone else I know.